Well, at the moment, it's going.
This post is more of a journal entry, since recording these things is important and valuable to me. Tonight being a parent is hard. Very hard. Natalie is in her room coughing...which means lots of waking up tonight from her. Jansen is just now calming down from an unprecedented tantrum/scream fest. Moments ago I heard him mutter, "I don't love her at all." He's talking about me...and although I KNOW he doesn't mean it, the stress of the night culminated and I burst into tears. Nate left with little Emmy who has shown us her fussy side the past few days. Hours of unsuccessfully trying to console her tonight got her shipped off the Lowe's with dad for a little bit (his idea). Dinner was some conglomeration of PB sandwiches, pizza, and other leftovers. Family Home Evening was a riot because it was just so crazy. Our opening song was three versions of songs about Natalie's favorite pretend dog Amigo.
I am spent and tired and wanting to fast forward a few months. But that's silly because life will always be hard.
I keep thinking of the phrase "I can do hard things"...a motto that was written on a plate Elaine S. Dalton had in her home. She said if she could change the motto it would read: “In the strength of the Lord, I can do all things.” I believe that. I believe I can do hard things. But I'm sure going to be praying a lot and needing the strength of the Lord. Really hard nights will pass. Even harder ones will come along. And surely sometime in my future there will be an evening spent on a beach sipping a smoothie and oh how I will appreciate it then!
Time to go to sleep. Well, sleep doesn't really exist around here right now. Time to try anyway.